Saying goodbye is something many people try to avoid. Leaving is not easy, especially when it is unexpected. It isn’t much easier even it is planned. Just the other day I was driving through Kandern and saw a couple I hadn’t talked with for quite a while, and I wondered how they were doing. Imagine my surprise when just 2 days later I read on Instagram a post from them saying they had just crossed the Belgium border and were almost home, having left Kandern that morning. After 8 years, they had left. It seemed like this was planned (there was a job lined up, for example, according to the post), and they were glad for their time here. But what a surprise!
We feel transition is something we specialize in. Not just because we’ve done alot of it. But because we treat it seriously. We see it coming, a change, and prepare. Now, in that sense we have been fortunate. Even when Shane’s parents passed away it was not unexpected. But not just their actual death, but their leaving. When someone has left, there aren’t opportunities to say things, to talk about something, to look into their eyes and just be there with them. With my parents, in great part to the part of the world to where I first left, we also made sure to make our goodbyes a good one. We talked, we spoke, we just spent time with each other, because as my mother would say, “You never know what’s going to happen in the intervening 2 or 3 years.” So in a sense, we’d been saying goodbye for 2 decades, continuing with Liberty and then Van; we also made our goodbyes good. So when they really did pass away, we already had closure (if that is the right word). We had said what we needed, we had spoken about what needed to be covered, we spent time with each other. Even Liberty and Van know the next time we see them it will be in heaven with Jesus. Now, that is a good thing to think about!
You may be here because of a recent email. We are facing a potential goodbye. It’s an interesting one because it may not just be to a place and a ministry, but to an entire way of life. Like many other overseas workers we’ve seen, our financial income has simply dropped low enough that remaining overseas isn’t possible. And, remaining in volunteer ministry is also in question… we need to pay the bills! This means a paid position. So, the goodbye that we are keeping an eye on as it’s on the horizon is a big one.
I hope we are ready, either way.
Saying bye to our favourite jiaozi restaurant in 2018A Black Forest landscape. Hey, where is the forest? This is looking south towards Basel, Switzerland.
How many posts of mine have started with a similar tone? Well, here is another. Every year goes by so quick. But, praise God, we somehow keep up. The picture above was taken over the Christmas holidays, so you might think it is the most recent pic of the Cookes. In fact, I’ve since shaved my beard (Christmas is over, so the Santa-look is no longer needed), and Michelle had her hair cut (looking young and vibrant as ever). Both Liberty and Van are still growing; it’s a regular occurrence for them to suddenly be standing beside me—do they want advice! A hug! Just to be near their father! No (but yes), it is simply to gauge our respective heights and see if they are finally taller than dad. I have withstood their height attempts thus far, but 2024 might be the year I lose the crown.
Thank you all for praying for us. Our ministry and service touches many lives. In Michelle’s case, the results are often very evident — the students love her and coming to class! I also enjoy seeing the students I teach move on from our one-on-one classes, taking with them the skills, experience, and confidence which they’ve built up over this past semester. Both of us get opportunities too to talk about God and how he moves in our lives.
I might be coming back to Canada in the early Spring! Our support level has remained low. This hasn’t been helped by the fact that we’ve been away for so long, with our only recent visit being last summer, and short at that. We believe if God wants us here longer, he will move people to contribute. This is the WEC mindset in action—enough people know about us, have heard about us, support us already, that out of all those people surely God can move some to contribute financially and partner with us in this specific time and ministry. “WEC doesn’t make appeals for funds”, but we do share the burden and the ministry God has given us. So, I might see you in a few months!
Spring, 2022. Can we say, “we made it”? All around people breath sighs of relief that the pandemic is weakening. Confinement measures are loosening. Where we are, masks are mostly not mandatory. You can now bisou your family, friends, neighbours. It’s been two years. A little more.
2 years ago in a local supermarket
The picture above shows the shelves of a local supermarket at the start of the pandemic. People were scared. They bought out the store, preparing for the worst. Like literally, people felt that the end-of-days was upon us, that roving bands of bandits would soon run amok, law and authority would disintegrate. They were hunkering down in part of because of this fear, but also because the government was soon to ban any unnecessary movement in public. Do you remember those days? We went weeks not being able to leave our home! Only one person per household was allowed to leave the home, and then for only one hour, and then only for a trip with a purpose considered essential. That was usually me — I would get to the supermarket, and scan the shelves for whatever was left and edible.
It was an eerie trip to make. It often reminded me of the time back in Urumqi during the riots in 2009. People were scared. They barricaded themselves in their xiaoqu’s, arming themselves with poles, sticks, axes, long knives, pulverizing hammers… Whenever I had to go out, I had to be incredibly careful because I could be mistaken as a potential threat (because I was not Chinese). Fortunately, we had lived there long enough that, as I approached a milling crowd full of nervous armed people eyeing me, someone could shout out, “He’s ok, he’s a foreigner in our xiaoqu!” and everyone would exhale and let me pass. Who was the enemy?
The past two years the enemy has been the virus. Sometimes though we let each other become the enemy too. “Who’s infected? Who’s not being careful enough? Who’s making choices I don’t agree with?” Finally. Finally, we are past the worst, on the outside. I think many of us still need to address the worst inside of us. That’s not a bad thing. Lots of bad things happened, and it was hard, and how were we to react?
Both my parents died while I was overseas, and I could not be there with them to see them onward. They and I were ready for that possibility. For years now, when we would say bye at the airport, we would acknowledge that this might be “Good Bye”. The first time we said “Good Bye” like that was really tough — maybe it was when I left as a married man. It was tougher when we left with their grandchildren. But we would never ignore what might happen, and we would tell each other what we needed to say, just in case. So our goodbyes tended to be pretty intense. But fulfilling. So not being there when the worst did come to pass was incredibly difficult. But we had already said goodbye, too. How can I say more? My tears suffice.
OK, so the title of the post hints at something positive, and I’ve somehow wandered into moroseness! Let me share. When you agree to follow God, you really never know what might be around the corner. Our years here in France are coming to a close. We’ve all learned French (some of us better than others). We’ve helped the local church as best we can. We’ve made a positive impact on the people around us. But we have reached a turn in the road. This turn points northeast of us, to a region in southwest Germany known as the Black Forest. In the Black Forest, where there are no bears, is a small town, with a bustling school. The town is called Kandern, and the school, Black Forest Academy. Over this past year God moved us to consider enrolling our kids there; this would necessitate Michelle and I either sending the kids as boarders, or applying to serve there. So we did what of course we would do! We applied to serve!
Recently, we finished the application process for all four of us, and received word back that we had all been accepted! We hadn’t shared much during this process as we wanted to be sure what their response would be before telling everyone. Well, what does this mean? It means that we will be moving to Kandern, Germany, later this summer to begin a new chapter of our overseas life at BFA. Michelle will be teaching elementary. I will be teaching slightly older grades with ELL as a focus. Liberty and Van will have a new English-speaking environment to thrive in, filled with children who, like themselves, have already lived in various and diverse places and situations. And staffed by teachers who care for the well-being of the students.
So. Something new on the horizon. Looking back, that horizon is rather bleak and grey. Looking ahead, the horizon looks colourful and promising. Thank you for your continued prayers, support, friendship, emails, letters, pics! Every contact with you is a blessing.
Well, here we are. We are back! It is always a strange process, coming back. When you’ve spent 2 or more years of your lives in other countries, dealing with the idiosyncrasies of life there, and made a life complete with habits and patterns and rhythms, and then leave it all: It is always an adjustment.
Fishing in Texas
For one thing, you return to a place wherein you already had a life and it is easy to get back into the rhythm of that past life. But many aspects of that life have changed. The stores have closed or changed. There are new traffic laws. The prices seem higher than you remember. And the lives of the people you know have changed too. You can’t ask the same questions as 2 years ago, but you aren’t sure yet about what the new questions ought to be.
And when you are the kid, the process is even stranger! You have memories, but nothing clear, so this return home is sort of the start of a new journey, but not really. Your parents have their memories that include you, but you don’t have them. You want to go to this or that place but since your parents have done it already maybe you won’t be able to do it. You miss the snacks you used to buy at the local shop that you could walk to, just you and your brother. But you can’t do that here since you have to drive to the corner store, and once there you need to be careful because a couple of street people are having an emotional breakdown or fight over stolen drug paraphenalia!
At the same time, it is so wonderfully blessed to be back in the land of the free (that is both Canada and the USA). You don’t have to wonder if you are being followed. There are no listening devices in your home. Cops won’t stop you on the street every 400 meters/yards demanding to see your smartphone. The food you buy is (generally) safe. The people are… friendly! They don’t stare at you! They say hello! You don’t need to go to a central police station and register your arrival! Wow!
There are churches! With crosses! You can pray in public! You can sing a praise song out loud. You can read a bible… anywhere! We are so thankful for all the good here in North America.
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Family in Canada
We got back to Ontario in February, and stayed for one month. We are now in Texas visiting Michelle’s family for one month. In April we will return to Ontario for 2.5 months of visitation and prepping for the next move. Do you remember, or know, what that next move is?
France
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Here we are a the end of Summer 2017. It has been a full summer for us, and we hope it has been for you too.
Zooming along chinese roads chinese style!
We traveled this summer to a small village 18 hours north of us to visit a student of Shane’s, and her family. It was an arduous journey with many police checks along the way. At each one Michelle and I had to register at that station, and then stand side by side holding up our passports with the ID page visible so the police could take a picture. However, it was worth it once we arrived at the student’s home. Her family was initially nervous because they had never met, nor hosted, foreigners before, much less ones who spoke their language – Kazak. But it was a good time. Liberty and Van especially loved roaming around the property with the younger siblings and checking out the animals such as chickens, chicks, cats, dogs, geese, goats, sheep, and a sleeping guard dog. One highlight was driving for about 3 hours towards the border of Kazakstan in order to watch a 20 km horse race, and the riders were mostly boys aged 10-15.
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The racetrack
Speaking of Kazakstan, we finally made a trip over the border to visit Almaty. You may recall me spending summers there from 1997-2002. There is now no need for a visa for many nations, so we were glad to skip the lengthy visa application process and simply show up at the border! Previous years required the better part of a day to get out of China, and into Kazakstan. This time we were through both sides in…. 1.5 hours. Unbelievable how much more smooth the process is now. While in Almaty Liberty could visit her best friend from earlier Urumqi days.
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We stayed in an AirBnB residence beside a giant mall. Inside this giant mall was a Starbucks and a McDonalds. Now, you can choose to go to these places anytime you want, but for us, it was an amazing experience. The province we live in has had no familiar business like these for years. So it was a treat to order a Grande Bold, in Kazak, as well as Big Mac, in Kazak. It was dizzying really.
On the bus to the border
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Liberty and Van had a great summer, grateful for a break from home school. We all went on many bike rides around the city. Probably one of our favourite memories of this season will be of riding around dinner time (5ish pm) and then stopping for our evening meal at a restaurant, eating a meal, then continuing the bike ride as the sun slowly sets and the street lights come on. Ili is actually fairly bike-friendly, so there are many streets where we can ride on bike lanes. There are still people to dodge, and e-bikes zipping around, but overall it is a safe and fun type of outing. There is also a pond full of goldfish, a turtle, frogs, and it is a fun place to play around. Van also learned how to rollerblade, and Liberty got better at it.
The Pond
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BBQ on the riverbank
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Today marks the end of our 6th week here in Ili; the start of our 7th week! We have been busy settling in. We are grateful that just outside our apartment is a large public square within which all the neighbourhood kids gather and play. They have been very welcoming of Liberty and Van; Van just jumped right on in and started getting dirty with the other boys. Liberty enjoys talking with the small groups of other girls who, having gotten brave in a group, come over to Liberty to try their English. But Liberty also likes watching the boys do their crazy stunts, and when there is something they ca not do, such as climb a particular tree, she sort of wanders over there, then climbs the tree! “I am just trying to help them see how to do it,” she says when we ask her why she did that. 🙂
How many times?
Here is a question for you: How many times in the last year have you needed to confirm with the local police your living arrangements? How many times in the last 5 years, you know what, let’s make that TEN years, have you had to visit the police for any reason pertaining to your person (I am not including crimes or emergencies)? Well, in the first 6 weeks we have been here we have had 2 visits by police to our apartment, 2 visits to the main police station, 2 visits to the campus police office, and one interview at the university Foreign Affairs Office with the Chief of Police, 2 assistant police officers, and the University Dept Chair, and the Faculty Head, and 2 other people (I have no idea who they were). You may recall us saying this part of the world can be tricky to get into, and to stay in… these police visit and interactions are all part of it.
Through it all we have had deep peace. Praise God. Near the end of the interview with the Chief of Police she began to relax and become more friendly. She thanked me (and by extension, our family) for choosing to come to her city to help teach the young people. She said to me, “Do you know what the greatest lesson you can teach them is? It is to help them appreciate all that is around them, and to help them learn to live as full a life as possible.” All I could respond with was, “Yes, I totally agree!”
Our Home
Food as usual is delicious! So glad to have some spicy noodles again. And even better, because there are actual Russians in this city who have a bakery, we can actually buy loaves of bread! Remember, we usually only have flat nan-style bread. Do not get me wrong, nan is delicious too and comes in handy for making pizza. We Westerners love our bread but our style typically is not available in China. But, it is here! White bread, brown bread, and even rye!
We are thankful the apartment we have been assigned is more or less fully furnished. We do need to get beds for the kids, and we needed some curtains and rugs, but by and large it is fine. The building we are in is called The President’s Building… because this is where the President of the university stays when he is here! He stays on the 3rd floor, and we are on the 4th floor. When we look out the windows we see many trees, so that is a nice change from our Urumqi apartments which usually looked out on another building.
Schooling
I started teaching classes 2 days after we arrived. Currently I am teaching 8 hours a week, spread over 3 days (Tues, Thursday, Friday), with about 4 hours of prep each non-class day. All my classes are first year students, which means for most of them I am the first foreigner they have seen and interacted with! The other day I needed something from home, so Michelle and the kids interrupted their homeschool to bring the things to me. Well, it was like Justin Bieber came to the class when Van and Liberty walked in! All the students were oohing and aahing, pulling out their cell phones to take pictures, even rushing to the front with their arms outstretched to touch or grab Van, or Liberty!! Then Michelle came in! Oh my, some of the students almost fainted with delight at the sight of her blond hair and bright smile!
Homeschool is also back in swing. Michelle has been amazing keeping things on track and in order despite all the travel and upheavals of the past year. It has been interesting trying to explain to people here what we are doing. The previous foreign family actually sent their kids to a local school, so we assume everyone thinks all foreigners would do the same. It maybe worked for that other family, but we have chosen to not do that, and Liberty and Van are thriving.
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As you know, we heard from the school who invited us to still come teach. We enjoyed a flurry of email from them, including one which had an Excel file with my teaching schedule. Since then the email levels have dropped back to 0. That is fine. What is important is that they actually sent the LOI to the visa company in Vancouver. The agent in turn confirmed that the LOI they received was actually correct! So on that side things are looking good. We refrained from sending our precious passports, photos, application forms, and other documents (like birth and marriage certificates) until we could receive confirmation about the above two “actually’s”. So we sent out our share of documents this week and they are due in Vancouver, to the same company, by Thursday. We paid extra for Express processing, so we figure we will get our passports with the China visas around April 4.
Until we get word that the applications were successfully submitted, we are holding off buying tickets, or cancelling our 6-month apartment rental contract. Once we know the visas have been issued and are on their way back to Chiang Mai, we will then prepare to leave.
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